Inside The Head Of My Toddler

When was the last time you spent some good quality time with a toddler.  It is crazy!  In fact, to quote one of my girlfriends, who also has a 2 year old, "Toddlers are bi-polar!" 

Here is a description of 3 minutes during a typical day with Madilyn.  By the way, each of these “emotions” lasts about 3 seconds.  This makes 3 minutes seem like FOREVER.  Enjoy!

1. I want to play with Daddy’s phone.
2. Shoes!!!  I want to put on my shoes.
3. GET MY SHOES OFF MY FEET NOW!
4. I want to push my brother in his swing.  Wee, wee.
5. I want to open and close the cabinets in the kitchen.
6. Is there anyone here with a phone I haven’t played with yet?
7. I NEED TO PUSH SOME BUTTONS.
8. I want to sit on the dog's head.
9. I want to throw all the blankets in the house on my brother.
10. OH MY GOSH, I’M STARVING.
11. CRACKERS.
12. BANANAS, NO CRACKERS.
13. I want out of my chair.
14. I want to play with the iPad.
15. I want to go outside. No, I want to go inside.
16. I want to lift my shirt up to show my belly.
17. Blue.  My shirt is blue.
18. WATER!
19. I want to read a book.
20. I’m thirsty.  WATER!
21. No, not for that.
22. Yes, perfect, milk. I’m going to squeeze this thing all over myself.
23. Where’s Daddy?
24. Where’s the dog?
25. Where’s Mommy?
26. SERIOUSLY WHERE’S MOMMY!?
27. Oh my God, I think Mommy left forever.
28. Ok, there’s mommy. I want to her to hold me while she holds the baby.
29. Hungry again. Never mind.
30. I just remembered not liking these shoes. Get them off.
31. STOP TAKING OFF MY SHOES!
32. Wow, I’m starving. I want grapes, but I don’t know how to tell anyone.
33. Finally, grapes. I like throwing these.
34. WHY DO I STILL HAVE THESE SHOES ON?
35. Oh look, a new person. I wonder if they have a phone.
36. I’m tired.
37. I’M NOT TIRED!
38. I want to go swing but I don’t want to go outside.
39. No, not inside either!
40. I need to play with my toys right now.
41. I hate this bow in my hair.
42. I want to brush my hair.
43. I want to sit at my table.  No, I don't.
44. STOP TRYING TO TAKE MY SHOES OFF!
45. I need to tell Mommy that I need to poo-poo.
46. Guess what, I already did.
47. I’m tired.
48. Stop asking me if I’m tired.
49. Where’s my pacifier, the giraffe one?
50. I want to go swimming in my clothes.
51. I want to twirl to music.
52. Where’s my brother?
53. Mine?  Mine?
54. Did I just hear a dog bark?
55. YOU DID NOT JUST TRY TO TAKE OFF MY SHOES AGAIN!
56. I want to see the dog.
57. No, not OUTSIDE! I want to see a dog inside.
58. WATER.
59. Up the stairs.  No, down the stairs.
60. I’m bored.

Madi Swinging at the Park

One last thing about toddlers, I have decided that they are also from another planet.  Or they are learning Parseltongue, not English.  This is the language Harry Potter could speak to snakes.  It is a language all their own and adults cannot understand it to save our lives.  I have tried to figure out what she could be saying and I really cannot figure it out.  I cannot wait until we all speak the same language.  In the meantime, here is a little clip of what I am talking about ... Sorry it is so shaky, we were in the car.